notion 46.
my eyes
pulled out-
didn’t
want to
see an-
y more.
07.24.2005.
notion 47.
get gone-
we’re all
fine here.
sat on the corner
of 59th,
asking somebody
fo’ a lil bit o’ change
to do a lil bit o’ drinkin’.
07.24.2005.
notion 48.
reflectionlessness.
07.24.2005.
will
i
am
not,
but
carlos
i
have
been,
but
could
not
will
to
am to be
like
william
carlos
williams.
could
not
will
to
enjoy,
get lost.
why
did
so much depend
upon
a
red
wheelbarrow.
i ams,
i is,
but
could
not
will
to be,
to say
i am
what i
could never be,
and
never was.
in america,
was i,
am i
an american?
poet?
o’ america
could i
will
to see myself
in your own
image?
i am
not
my
will-
the self
long
murdered
after
longing
for
someone else’s
self,
so
as to
feel more american.
uncle sam
was not
designed
in my image.
in fact,
it was designed
to crush my
image.
not in my name,
so how
did i will
to speak
under confused
tongues?
willing,
god willing
to pull the wool
over our eyes,
america,
oh say (josé),
can you see
how blind
you have been?
you have grown?
whitman’s america
wilted.
what walt?
and
i
could not
will to be
like
williams
just another
american poet.
i’ll
will to be
like
blake, rimbaud, kerouac, borges, ginsberg,
baraka
of the
world,
of the
americas.
oh say, i
do see
how this
country
never wanted
me.
07.24.2005.
you should tell
the kids about
maintaining their
culture even if
you have to
learn the
language
like they have,
and its importance.
07.2005.
notion 42.
so islands, we have fallen into
till self deserts the selves
of all the things we are
till we just all become aliens.
but it’s ok.
i won’t burst your bubble.
and like balloons float,
it’s ok.
don’t be afraid
of what you really are.
07.22.2005.
notion 43.
delusions
raised up like walls,
and innocence
has lost its place,
and it’s started
to hurt to dream.
hard to take
things so seriously.
are people
ever going to
change?
and the world
we’ve dreamed of
might never become
if we don’t
have time enough
to speak
or love anybody.
slowly dying
and innocence
has lost its place.
07.22.2005.
notion 38.
go live
your life
free from me.
i give you back your
liberty.
you treat me like i
stole it,
but you can
have it back
if you need
it that bad.
07.20.2005.
notion 39.
?
notion 40.
afraid of touch.
my bones shake.
you just broke me.
07.20.2005.
notion 41.
yes,
we all crash
into cars
out on the ground
against the stars,
but have you dreamed?
(you know i dream.)
of crashing, colliding
forwards, towards
love?
crash.
07.22.2005.
notion 36.
monica,
asleep
and me,
i can’t
escape.
i can’t
see a thing
in this
darkness.
07.20.2005.
notion 37.
i’m so god damn
fucking ugly.
who could ever really
want me?
i get lost in the confusion.
might as well just leave
me behind.
i’m some piece of shit
you found
and now to dispose.
just leave me.
i’m so fucking ugly.
who could ever really
want me?
believe me i understand.
throw me away.
i’m so fucking ugly.
who could ever really want me?
who could ever love me?
i’m so fucking ugly.
07.20.2005.
notion 34.
perdón,
pues nunca he sabido
como explicarme bien.
entiendan
que el sol
me esta pesando
el alma
con el recuerdo
de que otro
día vendrá,
y yo aun
sin verte.
perdón.
perdóname
las imperfecciones
todos mis defectos
y deficiencias.
07.16.2005.
notion 35.
y te tengo
un regalo,
pero lo tengo
bien escondido,
pues podría
venir alguien
quien me lo quiera robar.
lo llevo conmigo
adonde quiera que voy
que ahora te lo doy.
pero ten cuidado por favor,
pues que eres dueña
de mi corazón.
07.16.2005.
notion 33.
somos sangre derramada.
entre la tierra
esta la esencia
de nuestra historia.
pero pronto ya
todo esto
desaparecerá.
como todo lo demás-
olvidado,
enterado entre los sueños
o los demonios,
que nos han obligado
a recordar.
somos sangre derramada.
entre la tierra
esta la esencia
de nuestra historia.
fuimos creando imagines
para poder comprender
todo lo que
estaba pasando
hasta completamente
olvidarnos.
07.16.2005.
notion 30.
and then one day
as i approached
the end of my journey,
i realized a new one
had just begun,
and so now
i find myself
on a never ending
journey.
07.16.2005.
notion 31.
i asked the river for advice.
she whispered.
there was wind.
i could not hear.
she disappeared.
07.16.2005.
notion 32.
find us a safe space.
you know what the
whole
world
is thinking.
i can’t
even imagine
what they could be thinking?
07.16.2005.
UP!::urban po'E.Tree(s) 