notion d.
write life away
and social interaction.
no one understands
like my pen and
paper do.
lock me away underneath
to repent
for having been sent.
08.24.2004.
notion e.
while
studying memory,
i only want
dreams to be
free.
not have to pay for
what i’m thinking,
and be sure it’s me
that’s doing the feeling,
and not just another marketing scheme.
08.30.2004.
notion c.
soy
yo todo
este dolor.
como
explicarte mi amor
lo que nunca sabremos.
como
se dicen las cosas
sin quebrarse el alma.
yo
soy todo
este dolor.
del cual
yo nunca
he podido escapar.
pues ya no hay
manera de ser
feliz.
como
una triste lagrima
se sequaron
mis palabras.
08.03.2004.
notion a.
this mr. president be angry.
someone please,
give him
some ecstasy.
05.2004.
notion b.
so that the effects of these
economics on hispanics and blacks
is not some concept that’s abstract,
but plain obvious.
just go check out some facts,
and ask
city tenements, ghetto projects.
prison cells are modern forms
of slavery and shackles.
but no one blames presidents
or their cabinets
for a nation of addicts
chasing american dreams,
blindly hustling schemes.
just to get by,
just to get by,
just to get by-
barely under the radar,
hoping not to be bombed
or found disposable.
06.06.2004.
contents.
introduction.
preface (notions a-q).
prologue.
in chicago.
notions 1-35.
in querétaro.
notions 36-54.
in la ciudad de méxico (méxico city).
notions 55-56.
in puerto escondido.
notions 57-78.
in san cristóbal de las casas.
notions 79-98.
in guadalajara.
notions 99-115.
on a plane from guadalajara to atlanta.
notions 116-127.
on a plane from atlanta to chicago.
notions 128-140.
in chicago back again.
epilogue (notions i-xvii).
Copyright © 2006 by Jose L. Frausto. The book author retains sole copyright to his contributions to this book.
36 haiku on suicide and the disappearing pond.
the wheels rotating
then going out of control
stampeding the rest.
stampeding the rest,
over the rest of the world.
too late to stop now.
to late to stop now,
this is how it’s always been.
no one changes things.
no one changes things
because either no one cares
or has enough time.
or has enough time,
so that all that is known is
never really known.
never really known,
everyone’s a shadow
quickly passing by.
quickly passing by
no one is meant to stay long
cherishing people.
cherishing people
offers temporary hope and
and optimism.
and optimism
matters little when cup is
completely empty.
02.03-12.20.04.
36 haiku on suicide and the disappearing pond. p.3
a message sent in,
an alien satellite
requesting return.
requesting return
to an island to escape
to rest my tired bones.
to rest my tired bones,
remove this feeling of pain
to be left alone.
to be left alone,
an opening universe
awaits by the dark.
awaits by the dark,
silent whisper of murder
calling dreams to rest.
calling dreams to rest
so that consciousness can rest
with eternity.
with eternity,
one should always roam and not
amongst the simple.
amongst the simple,
the burden becomes too great
till nothing matters.
till nothing matters
and burnt out like a candle,
the wheels rotating.
02.03-12.20.04.
36 haiku on suicide and the disappearing pond. p.2
and pulls the trigger,
scraping off time’s memory,
peeling mental scabs.
peeling mental scabs,
red begins to overflow-
pain all in my head.
pain all in my head,
creates chaos, confusion
when asked, why i choose.
when asked, why i choose
to live apart? i reply,
to keep myself sane.
to keep myself sane,
some secrets can’t be revealed.
how much can one share?
how much can one share
before feeling invaded?
please, just let me leave.
please, just let me leave,
fading energy rising
desire to give up.
desire to give up
and a need for migration,
returning to space.
returning to space
towards a feeling of home-
a message sent in.
02.03-12.20.04.
36 haiku on suicide and the disappearing pond.
just needed some space-
it was getting too stuffy,
and i couldn’t breathe.
and i couldn’t breathe,
an intellectual’s dream
while reading nietzsche.
while reading nietzche
and exploring jean-paul sartre,
sank into a void.
sank into a void,
all surrounded by darkness,
i wanted to die.
i wanted to die,
but thought that that would be rude,
so stayed for a while.
so stayed for a while,
and all things became unclear.
who murdered nature?
who murdered nature
or the original state?
now, how should i be?
now, how should i be?
these blank stares aiming at me,
shooting off weapons.
shooting off weapons,
blood spreads all over this space
and pulls the trigger.
02.03-12.20.04.
blank.
i’m not the only one
weapon of,
dedicated to,
in the name of the
_____________blank.
but not in my
name of the
_____________blank.
check the i.d.
i’m not the only one,
anonymous,
often lost amongst the mist
a
_____________blank
message w/out sender.
no one remembers my
_____________blank.
_____________blank, _____________blank, _____________blank
when the gun went off
into the sky.
i’m not the only one,
_____________blank,
anonymous.
i’m not the only one,
_____________blank,
anonymous.
_____________blank,
anonymous.
10.24.05.
UP!::urban po'E.Tree(s) 