in queretaro: notion 45.

notion 45.

will
i
am
not,
but
carlos
i
have
been,
but
could
not
will
to
am to be
like
william
carlos
williams.
could
not
will
to
enjoy,
get lost.
why
did
so much depend
upon
a
red
wheelbarrow.
i ams,
i is,
but
could
not
will
to be,
to say
i am
what i
could never be,
and
never was.
in america,
was i,
am i
an american?
poet?
o’ america
could i
will
to see myself
in your own
image?
i am
not
my
will-
the self
long
murdered
after
longing
for
someone else’s
self,
so
as to
feel more american.
uncle sam
was not
designed
in my image.
in fact,
it was designed
to crush my
image.
not in my name,
so how
did i will
to speak
under confused
tongues?
willing,
god willing
to pull the wool
over our eyes,
america,
oh say (josé),
can you see
how blind
you have been?
you have grown?
whitman’s america
wilted.
what walt?
and
i
could not
will to be
like
williams
just another
american poet.
i’ll
will to be
like
blake, rimbaud, kerouac, borges, ginsberg,
baraka
of the
world,
of the
americas.
oh say, i
do see
how this
country
never wanted
me.

07.24.2005.