out of water.

out of water.

so just get up your feet, grow wings and fly.
it’s time to leave this place anyway.
not everyone is meant to survive
this, so just find a place for sleep to stay.
escaping the haunting of creeping shadows,
some secrets weren’t meant for all to hear.
some hearts corrupt when winds begin to blow
to escape any reminder of fear.
while aging bones disintegrate away,
the scars of youth tearing open the flesh.
it’s time to leave this place anyway
cause in crowds it’s hard to fit in and mesh.
cause life was a color none could see,
and loved, something humans just could not be.

12.31.04.

how the child forgot.

how the child forgot.

kill past regrets of murdered innocence
for a profit that would not benefit,
of a life that’s murdered every second-
such a planet for one to inhabit.

then mutilated childhood fantasies
became mere detached fragments of past.
unconscious of ancient memories,
so that the purer spirit would not last.

the child’s eyes were forced to focus all day
until the child had no glimpse of distance,
until the child believed in the old ways.
the child should have taken a firmer stance.

but the child just wanted to be grown up,
and all that had passed the child could not stop.

12.31.04.

getting together (how wars are planned).

getting together (how wars are planned).

and so the mind one day became an absolute
that led towards a disappearing star, which now
fading out conjured up thoughts meant just to pollute
the idlest of minds awaiting dreaming, but how?

how little of love some hearts do ask in return
after having allowed emotions to enter
and dilute all sensibility of reason,
guiding one even farther from our true center.

center crashing one against the spaces around,
demanding that the moon get back in position
so that the stars can continue to collide down
where they will begin to crush these gentiles’ nations.

cause all the world really needs are atomic bombs,
as long as millions consciously drop it as one.

06.02.04.

misconceptions and quick judgments (why no one reads).

misconceptions and quick judgments (why no one reads).

discard truths and other hopeless notions.
ideals and love only on islands
deep enough for one to drown in oceans,
so no one gets annoyed or pays a mind.
stop talking politics and discussing
to stop the brain from spinning around.
things will just keep getting more confusing.
some truths are never going to be found,
and still some souls will dare the pain of search.
others dropping to knees, and start to pray.
but all one day returning back to dirt-
only ounce of knowledge gained from today.
were it not but for the joy of sleeping,
one would probably spend the time fucking.

06.16.03.

dark creeps in.

dark creeps in.

the world is getting smaller, isn’t it?
soon all the walls will begin caving in.
into which category will you fit-
less classifications for everything?
so march in line and look the other way.
there’s not enough time to be critical
when all one has is getting past today.
there’s not enough time for the world to stall.
the noise is just static that surrounds.
with every second, sinking in deeper
to the madness that is always around
from the spaces crawling ever closer.
and no one to meet out there on the edge
while contemplating jumping from the ledge.

05.24.03.

awaiting.

awaiting.

that moment of release entering sleep.
that second when time becomes slow motion,
and the world delivers secrets to keep
much more profound than the deepest ocean.
resting under our hearts’ dreamy feelings,
there hidden a light shadow of gray.
into dark, our hearts continue sinking-
just a little color would save the day.
so come and lead me by the hand to you.
i’ve been here sitting, staring at the sky.
my innocence has led me here to you,
and i have learned to stop asking why.
awaiting something that’s just a feeling,
anything to keep me from just dying.

05.22.03.

singing towards the wind against the world.

singing towards the wind against the world.

she knows
all my dirty
little secrets.

everyday
she finds a way
inside

to dance
around in there
without regret.

she’s opened love,
which now cannot
just hide.

world arrives to challenge any true love.
world grows jealous of things it cannot have.
world is imagined and then plays pretend.
world says no, no. say so, so and just sing.

if the universe
were to consume me

and then took away everything,

there’d be one thing
it could not take
from me-

a faith in
feelings over straight
thinking.

just kept on writing,
hoping someone

out there
would be listening
to this song.

05.04.03.

winter hurt.

winter hurt.

an age of depression and loneliness
imprisons false hearts not set for freedom
into nightmares no one can escape from.
with time, all love becomes a cold numbness-
a tired and fading signal of distress.
where in this land will one find salvation
from voices in my head- screaming demons?
imagination created this mess.

imagination created your hell,
a world where everyday you fall in
deeper into a feeling of fading.
cold winter pains have one under a spell
forming a universe where all things spin.
but well, there is no escape from dying.

02.20.03.

what’s up with the attitude.

what’s up with the attitude.

anger management
      is all out of reach,
all depending
      on one’s disposition.
nothing’s really left
      for the earth
            to teach
and nature has become
      an alien.
this bitter winter
      has a tight hold
            on,
suffocating all
      innocent feeling.
hearts look inside
      then start to
            wander on
until all memory begins
      peeling
the hidden layers of
      being
            fading.
in seconds humans become
      animals,
evolution doesn’t mean anything,
and so humanity will
      one day fall.
how many bombs will
      your president
            drop
before the nation demands
      that he
            stop?

02.20.03.

difficulty of conversation.

difficulty of conversation.

feel like such a baby on this planet
as no stranger to desperate feelings
in a lonely life that’s filled with regret,
while inhabitants of dirty feelings
keep mentioning something about leaving.
questions are created by our darkness
feeling the universe not listening,
falling towards eternal nothingness-
empty like naked already undressed.
sincerity unfolds as secrets aimed
towards ideas that don’t reach success.
and for this drowning who are we to blame?

no one to blame for this isolation.
no one to blame but our hesitation.

02.19.03.